Understanding Hopelessness During COVID 19

For most of us, COVID may look like: a couch, the tv screen, the inside of the fridge, masks, gloves, soap, anxiety, kids running circles around the dining room table, too much time on our hands, but most of all it's a fear of the unknown.

Our minds are always problem solving and COVID is currently a huge unsolvable problem. We have constant reminders to wash our hands, wear a mask, stay inside, social distance. These instructions are keeping us safe right now. But somehow we're still left feeling... unprotected. We're feeling irritated, even more stressed and restless. Before COVID, some of us were experiencing significant conflicts in our lives but we had our routines to fall back on. That felt safe. But now, even stepping outside the front door seems to tower over any of our own conflicts that we might still be wanting to overcome. We have had to create new routines. We are facing new conflicts.

This might makes us feel that our issues are now unimportant, that we must shift our focus and face any new impending stressors instead. As a result we are lost, frustrated, bored, energy-zapped or even feeling completely hopeless.

The first thing we must understand about feelings of hopelessness during COVID:

This is a normal emotional response.

You are not alone.

Hopelessness is a normal emotional response because it is connected to the part of you that is hurting. All of your internal conflicts, your most intense emotions, are actually the parts of you that care about you.

So, what can we do to help better ourselves during COVID 19?

19 Inspirations for Self-Care during COVID

1. Get some sun.

I know, you're 5 episodes away from finishing that new series you started yesterday... but your body doesn't want to keep sitting on the couch (Netflix will still be there when you get back, promise). Plan time for yourself (safely!) away from the house. Whether it's on a trail, in your back yard or just laps around the block. Take the kids! It's actually more important than we realize. Did you know vitamin D deficiencies are directly linked to depression and anxiety? It's true. The sun helps regulate your mood. And yes, you can take vitamins too, but isn't it also nice to see something other than your tv? No wonder we see so much happy smiling sun art!

2. Limit your time on social media to only 1 hour a day.

3. Shift your perspective.

This is different than shifting your beliefs or avoiding what you appreciate. But try not to view hopelessness as absolute truth. Hopelessness is the part of you that's trying to heal. Take some time to research your feelings. This is not about finding symptoms. Find books, shows, podcasts that talk about your perspective but also NEW perspectives. See both sides of the coin. This is about finding common ground and inspirations for motivation.

4. Stay Hydrated!

Did you know? Dehydration impairs serotonin production, zaps energy, increases stress and also causes anxiety, depression, hunger, cloudy thinking? Have at least 8 cups of water a day. Research recommendations based on your gender, age and weight.

5. Find a Therapist.

Going to therapy doesn't mean you're crazy. This word should never be used to describe a person, not even yourself! Think of a therapist as a listening mirror. Therapy is a space for you to look inward and heal the parts of you that are causing feeling of hopelessness.

6. Call a friend or family member you haven't talked to in a while.

7. Start your morning with positive or calming thoughts. "I cannot worry about things I cannot change" or “I am confident” or “I am grateful for ______.”

8. Buy or create a 2020 - 2021 planner.

Yes, we've seen the memes. The "worst purchase EVER" is the 2020 planner. But there's still an amazing opportunity here. Despite everything, we're still having to create new routines. You might not have the same schedule you've been used to, but you have all the time you need to create good days. Plan your brand new exercise routine. Find some recipes and plan some exciting new meals you want to try. Plan times with loved ones and virtual meetups. But just remember -- don't cancel plans with yourself. You must think of each plan like a very important appointment. Fill all those blank pages with days brimmed with activity and life.

9. Forgive yourself

for one mistake you may have made. Re-frame it into ways that it made you a better person or the important lesson it taught you. Use that lesson to feel stronger about yourself and the future.

10. Try to wake up early to catch a sunrise. Or take time to watch a sunset.

11. Unsubscribe from "Junk" emails.

12. Music Therapy.

Compile fun playlists of all your favorite songs from different parts of your past. You can even create playlists to encourage happier feelings (don't try to create sadder feelings). You may even discover great new music!

13. Make a list of things you have to start says "NO' to.

Start setting up boundaries for yourself to grow. You are worth it.

14. Podcasts

Discover the world of podcasts on all your favorite subjects or new subjects you'd be interested to learn more about. Engaging in thoughtful, fun, or intellectual discussions keeps us tied to the world we live in.

15. Breathing exercises.

Set aside time to quiet your mind. It doesn't have to be guided meditations if that's not your thing. Just breathing and focusing on your breath for even 5 to 10 minutes a day is shown to have a significant impact on overall brain functioning. For meditation, try visiting https://www.calm.com/, a very popular site for beginners who are interested in meditation.

16. Get better sleep.

Start by waking up an hour earlier than you normally would. Try to also go to sleep an hour earlier. Repeat this process to start regulating your sleep.

17. Start an exercise routine.

You don't have to run a marathon. Just find a collection of exercises that you know you can achieve and master them. There are many free routines on YouTube including exercise channels that help keep you on track. Take time to keep your body healthy. Use weights or even materials you have around your house. Once you've mastered a routine you should keep challenging yourself. Remember: it takes a month to set up a habit. That's 30 days of setting aside at least an hour to exercise. Even if you are tired the next day, spend that hour stretching calmly with music or do an easy yoga routine. It's about setting up the habit first. It's hard work at first, but once you start achieving goals it will be easier for you to maintain.

18. Plan a Virtual Game Night with friends!

Webcams are affordable now and any smart phone can be used to make a virtual call. Find games like bingo, cards, or 20 Questions. There are many virtual platforms that are simply accessed through the internet. You can even make up your own or plan an online movie party! FInd something that works for everyone.

19. Make space for yourself.

Clear the clutter. How can we expect to feel less overwhelmed when we're surrounded by all those pieces of mail, or the clothes you haven't worn in 8 years or that list of projects that just never get done? Or maybe the clutter is actually a person and you're feeling trapped inside something that doesn't resemble yourself at all. You don't need that clutter. You don't need the drama. Be motivated! Each week, just get rid of 6 things you don't need to keep. And you don't have to view it like work. You have the time to make a small oasis for yourself! That 5-star hotel space or maybe it's just that feeling of keeping things clean. Plan time for your peace. Make space for yourself.

Most of all, try to remember that we are given opportunities to grow during stressful times.

Taking time for self-care, reflection, and setting achievable goals are the most effective ways to challenge feelings of hopelessness. By putting in effort, you can channel these feelings into something incredibly positive and powerful.